Saturday, March 23, 2013

A Beautiful Man, A Beautiful Soul.

My life, my soul mate, my love is gone!

Devastation, sadness, grief and heartache are all just words that can't begin to describe what my daughter and I are feeling at the moment.

André has left us for an important, unexpected and unscheduled meeting with Angels!

He will never come through the door, never take us in his arms, never tease us, never get angry at the dog anymore.

The battle is lost, he died on the night of Marsh 21st. His weakened body gave up.

Since then this song below, has been in my mind constantly. Is he the one playing it repeatedly? Is it auto suggestion? I have no idea. It's not a song that had any specific meaning for us and please don't imagine us as deranged looking Elvis fans. It was not "our song" but somehow it describes the way I feel and dare I say, the way he somehow felt about me.

It all started in an elevator, a device made to carry us upward, a place where you never know who you will meet. In one, I met the man of my life. I was 18.

For all my adult life, he's been my confidant, best friend and lover. I'm afraid he's done more for me than I for him and thinking of going on without him could be unbearable except that he's leaving me with the best thing we've ever done together, our daughter.

She is so much like her father, a constant reminder of how incredibly strong and wise he was. It's not fair to lose a parent a few months short of 14 but this past week she seems to have been infused with the personality of her dad. She has been my rock! I can only hope that I will be able to guide and keep her happy.

André was a beautiful man, a beautiful soul.

Thank you all for your support, for the prayers, the virtual hugs and for the words of comfort.

Hélène xoxo

Angel Wings, Victoria Station
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